Monday, August 30, 2010

The Eagle Has Landed!



My book is finally on sale! The books are arriving to their destinations!

It will probably be available in your local Catholic bookstore, but if you prefer online ordering, you can get it through Amazon.com: http://amzn.to/c9ry4u

Also, I will update my main website with appearances as I schedule them. This week, I will be on EWTN's Son Rise Morning Show with Brian Patrick at 7:20 a.m. You can learn more about the show here: http://bit.ly/12jyBI

One more thing I want to share with you. I met with Anthony Buono of avemariasingles.com last week and he is a really great guy. Although he is a married man, he is very sensitive to the struggles that single Catholic women go through. His website is a great way to put yourself out there, and it sounds like he is very accessible to people who use it. I used it when I was single!

Blessings on your week.

Sunday, August 22, 2010

Stat Says There Are More Single Women Than Men

My new web site is up and running! Visit it at amybonaccorso.com. It has an RSS feed function….and a Wordpress blog. So, I’m pondering a transition from Blogger to this beautiful new Wordpress option.

Anyhoo, check out what I just read!

“More than half of the unmarried Americans are women. And for every 100 single women, there are 88 unmarried men available.”

The full article of stats is here:
Single? You’re Not Alone. : http://www.cnn.com/2010/LIVING/08/19/single.in.america/index.html?hpt=C2

Many of us intuitively feel (or felt) this troubling man shortage. It’s that experience of doing all of the right things and being uber-smart and attractive, and still - it’s hard to find a good marriage partner.

Another article I read recently by a single woman boiled the success of finding a good husband all down to “luck.” Luck? Really? While I don’t completely agree with that, it is a sign of how hopeless some women feel.

In the Catholic community – some dating advice I got was very idealistic – sometimes over the top idealistic. The advice could certainly make women feel hopeless.

When stats say there are more women who are probably looking to get married than men, it means that the environment is more competitive and that idealism needs to be replaced with realism.

Women who are looking need to think about their dating strategy.

For example, I read a book when I was about 24 that advocated old school courtship. It said Christian women should have men go through their father to get dates. I’m talking old school stuff. This advice can also be found in conservative Protestant circles.

Is this realistic advice to be giving in 2010? Put dating advice through a logic filter.

If there are more women than men who are looking – why would a guy spend the extra time to go through a formal and outdated process for finding a wife? If he is a desirable mate (good personality/character, attractive enough, educated/has a good job) – he can probably find another woman who would be thrilled to date him - and who would not require him to jump through annoying hoops.

Put too many hoops up for a nice guy to jump through these days and he’s going to say, “What the heck? Am I a circus animal?” Choose hoops carefully. Make sure your “requirements” are meaningful.

After sharing the stat with my husband, he said “Yeah, men are in the position to make women work for it.”

Unfortunately!

So how does a modern woman get to ‘I Do’? Don’t put up with abuse (seriously, being a doormat sucks), but get serious about shaving off superfluous requirements, including outdated courtship obstacle courses.

Tuesday, August 10, 2010

Fr. McCloskey Talks About Challenges for Older Singles

Fr. C. John McCloskey was my spiritual director in Washington DC and gave me the push I needed as a young woman to get out of my shell and start dating more. I like this clip of him - he discusses older singles. I appreciate his honesty about fertility concerns, but also his encouragement for older people to still pursue companionship!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z8RuQ8eGnTg

You'll hear more from Father soon - he wrote the Foreword for my book.

Article Discusses How Hyper-Churchiness Can Keep Ladies Single

I loved this article: "Does the Black Church Keep Black Women Single?" Trust me - this discussion is not just about or for black women. Many Christian women are experiencing the same issues.

I certainly believe that hyper-churchiness can keep women single if they aren't careful.

Enjoy the article!

http://www.cnn.com/2010/LIVING/08/10/black.church.women.single/index.html?hpt=C2

Saturday, August 7, 2010

Get a Life Changing Reality Check!

I’ve been preparing for the launch of my new book in the next few weeks and am working with an awesome web designer to re-do my main website: www.amybonaccorso.com.

I spend so much of my life online that having a good website is important to me. More and more people get their information online. We pay our bills online, register for classes, buy our music, check our retirement accounts. Our lives are lived partly in an online universe.

As part of this website building exercise, I wanted to boil down what me and my product(s) are about into one easy tagline. I went through a bunch of options, and finally went with “Get a Life Changing Reality Check!”

As I was narrowing down the many intriguing options into the one simple phrase I wanted to go with, I told my husband, “Well, what I have to say is life changing and I started writing because I saw so many of my girlfriends literally wasting their lives. They weren’t taking charge of their lives at all, but couldn’t figure out why they weren’t getting anywhere they wanted to go.” When I'd try to help out, much of what I said had a "reality check" ring to it. This comes out in my writing.

He said, “You need to tell people that.”

So there you have it. When you see my tagline online, you’ll know how it was born.

Creating taglines is a really fun exercise and can be worthwhile if you are trying to develop a brand. It can also be a good exercise if you are trying to distill your goals into a bite-sized theme that will energize you and focus your efforts.